3 Keys to Mastering Art of French Conversation

Living as an expatriate in Paris, engaging in French conversations immediately brings to mind the importance of language proficiency. Naturally, having a robust vocabulary, solid grasp of grammar, and clear pronunciation are vital for both casual and more serious French dialogues.

BUT... it's not just about the words and grammar structures you use; understanding cultural norms and codes is equally crucial!

Ever wonder why it's essential to greet someone as soon as you enter a shop? Or why Parisians often say « c'est pas mal » instead of « j'aime »? And how do you initiate a meaningful conversation with a Parisian?

I'm Fabienne, a French language instructor for foreigners and co-founder of Novexpat, a French language school for expats. In this article, I'll unveil three secrets to help you decode French conversation customs and share practical examples for your next interactions.

The Magic of Courtesy

Courtesy is, indeed, the golden key in all French conversations.

French children are constantly reminded, « C'est quoi le mot magique ? » (What's the magic word?), to prompt « s'il te plaît » (please) or « merci » (thank you). Growing up with this, it's no surprise that phrases like « bonjour » (hello), « s'il te plaît » (please), « merci » (thank you), and « au revoir » (goodbye) are ingrained in the French culture.

Moreover, shops and public transport are seen as public spaces but are culturally treated as private. They're viewed as the merchant's "home". Notice how the French say, « chez le boucher » (at the butcher's), « chez le primeur » (at the greengrocer's)… using « chez », which means "at the home of". This is why observing polite customs is so important. Imagine you're a guest, not just a customer, and the shopkeeper or bus driver is your host.

The Art of Implication

French sentences often carry hidden, implicit meanings. Context, insinuation, and stylistic devices often alter or add to a message's underlying meaning. Here are some figures of speech commonly used by Parisians:

– Irony, where the opposite of what is meant is said. For instance, someone might remark on a heavy rain, « Quel temps magnifique ! » (What wonderful weather!), accompanied by a big smile.

– Euphemism, to indirectly express thoughts. A Parisian might describe a movie as « C'est pas mal » (It's not bad), which actually means "It's great!". Or say, « Je ne suis pas convaincu » (I'm not convinced) to mean "I disagree".

– Implication, to subtly offer a critique, leaving interpretation up to the listener. For example, commenting on someone's diet by saying, « Ah, je ne pourrais jamais me priver de toutes ces bonnes choses. » (I could never give up all these delights.) actually implies the diet is too restrictive.

For an expat, these implied messages might not be immediately apparent. The key is to pay attention to tone, facial expressions, and body language that invariably accompany these indirect communication methods, conveying subtle nuances.

Moreover, to express yourself in French, you're not obliged to use these modes of communication. However, being aware of them will better prepare you for your next 100% French conversation!

Seeking Intimacy in Conversation

Deep conversations about memories, emotions, and ideals are common among Parisians, whether at social gatherings, in hallways, or even with strangers on the subway.

Parisians often dive into heartfelt and intimate exchanges, readily opening up to strangers when a sense of camaraderie or connection is felt. Finding common ground (like shared interests in education, vacation spots, travels, sports, or cultural affinities like music, art, or cinema) is the ultimate conversation starter.

Bonus Tip: Revel in Speaking French!

Remember, French speakers pay a lot of attention to tone and intonation, not just words. Your mood and smile greatly influence how your message is received. So, take joy in speaking French! Enjoy using your newly acquired phrases. The French will sense this and will be more inclined to continue the conversation.

Happy chatting in Paris! ☀️